The Jewish Halloween

There is always some debate as to whether or not Jews should participate in Halloween, being that it isn’t a Jewish holiday and all. But, like it or not, your kid wants to go trick or treating. And like it or not, your girlfriend wants to go to that cool costume party.

So you’re gonna need a costume. I hate costumes. I have enough trouble finding normal clothes to wear in the morning. Now you want me to buy something that I can only wear one night a year? I’m dreading it already.

But if you’re going to have a costume, why not put a Jewish twist on it? Here are a couple Jewish Halloween costumes that I suggest:

Haman: Halloween is kind of like the bizarro-Purim. So if you’re going to dress up as Esther during Adar, you might as well go as her arch-nemesis in October.

Maimonides: Just because it is Halloween, it doesn’t mean you don’t have to be lame!

Slutty Maimonides: Halloween is an opportunity to explore your “wild” side. The Rambam might want to add a little spice in his life.

Chopped Liver: It’s pretty easy to make. Just wear all brown and eat a lot of onions before you go out. Then, if you talk to a pretty lady, and she walks away in disgust from your horrible breath, you can say, “What am I? Chopped liver?”

And finally…

Orly Taitz: The queen of the birther movement! Be both topical and Jewish! Do this costume this year before her 15 minutes of fame run out!

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