Praying on Display: Learning to Pray All Over Again

Ann with the Torah

Ann with the Torah

I have always derived great pleasure from personal prayer during worship services. Spirituality is core to my identity; the journey of our Shabbat and holiday liturgy is familiar to me and comforting to me. It is my time, which might sound selfishand I had not realized just how dependent on that selfish time I had become, until recently when I became a Jewish professional.

Last year, in addition to my work with the Goldring/Woldenberg Institute of Southern Jewish Life, I accepted the position of Educator at my home synagogue in New Orleans. Along with this amazing dream of a job comes the awesome responsibility of teaching others how to involve themselves in worship. One way we do this is by teaching the liturgy in Hebrew classes and prayer services; another, for me, is by setting the example of being sincere in my own prayer.

The irony? Sincerity in my own prayer has never been an issueuntil now, when I am on “display.”

Trying to strike a balance between teaching, leading, and praying is not an easy task! During the High Holidays last year, I was so very busy trying to keep up and catch up with all of my responsibilities that frankly I did not even attempt very much personal prayer. This year, by contrast, I was totally prepared, and had all of my projects for families and children set up in advance… in an effort to set the stage for my own prayer space once again.

I still wasn’t back to my usual spiritual self. Even with all of the preparation, the holiday experience was still just off-and-on successful. I feared a return to truly meaningful prayer while “on display” might be a lost cause for me, until a good friend and cantorial soloist pointed out something really simple and profound:

My personal prayer and spirituality can be every bit as sincere and meaningful as it once was, if I accept that it will never be the same as it once was.

My cantorial soloist friend taught me that now, my greatest spiritual moments were to be focused on enhancing the worship experience of the congregation. This is where she derives her Shabbat and High Holiday holiness, outside of herself. And this is where I am now learning to do the same thing. Part of this experience is not taking myself so seriously! I began to see the insanity in what I was trying to do, and it made me laugh at my own self, and simply relax and let it be.

With this new role, I also appreciate new elements of prayer. I still, and always will, value my private prayer moments, too. But when I see a kid have an “aha” moment connecting the dots in our liturgy, or lead a prayer with confidence, or an adult catches my eye during a sermon because he or she remembers that we discussed a similar point, or I notice someone following along in the Hebrew because I helped them learn how to do that, these will now be my personal worship experience focus!

What has been your journey as a lay person or a Jewish professional in personal prayer?  How is it different as you have aged, grown or changed roles?

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Posted on October 10, 2014

Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on MyJewishLearning are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

What Does a Southern & Jewish Sukkot Parody Look Like?

You know that song that’s been playing on the radio? That one with the really catchy tune that you just can’t get out of your head? We all have one.

For Vikki Goldstein of B’nai Israel Congregation in Pensacola, Florida, that song was Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off.” This song is so catchy that Vikki wanted a Sukkot version to teach the students at B’nai Israel. So she called me, since I’m her Education Fellow, wanting to know if I had any ideas for lyrics or ways to use the song.

Along with my fellow Fellows, and Rabbi Matt Dreffin, we went a step beyond lyrics. Vikki’s call led to this fun video… which now, we’re sharing not only with Vikki’s Pensacola students, but also with everyone who wants to get in on the #ShakeLulav fun:

Sukkot is a time for welcoming guests and celebrating nature. Part of the celebration includes shaking the lulav (palm fronds, myrtle leaves, and willow branches) together with an etrog (citrus fruit) to encourage rain and prosperity in the next growing season.

It’s all celebratory, and the perfect excuse to sing and dance along to this peppy tune. Enjoy the video, which includes dancing, a dinosaur, mad music making, costumes… and would any Southern & Jewish Sukkot video without a dancing Elvis impersonator? No way! So we got one—and our Elvis is pretty fun.

Chag sameach – a happy holiday!

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Posted on October 8, 2014

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Rabbi Thrown Out Of Jackson Restaurant: The Real Story

“Did you hear about the rabbi getting thrown out of a Jackson restaurant?”

Everyone at our office has been asked that by friends and family near and far, after the story made national news last week.

communityOf course we heard about it. Some may have even wondered if I was involved, since I am a rabbi in Jackson, Mississippi, and there are only so many of us. But I am not the rabbi in this story; it was my colleague Rabbi Ted Riter, the interim rabbi of Beth Israel Congregation here in Jackson.

Rabbi Riter went to a small Greek restaurant—one he’s been to before—and placed a to-go order. The owner made an anti-Semitic slur regarding the size of the side salad. The rabbi, puzzled, asked for clarification. Rather than change course, the owner just dug in deeper, asking if Rabbi Riter was Jewish. When he said yes, the owner responded by cursing him out and demanding he leave the establishment store. News of the incident travelled quickly, from social media to local media to national coverage.

The Jewish community sometimes gets criticized for being overly sensitive when it comes to anti-Semitism. History teaches us that, unfortunately, such heightened sensitivity is necessary – but it’s important to balance vigilance with reason. In a country as large as ours, there will always be individuals prone to words and actions that we find objectionable. As disturbing as these cases may appear, they should not be our real worry. One person’s ignorant comments do not represent an entire city.

Further, if we turn our attention toward every isolated attack, we give such people more power than they deserve while giving ourselves unwarranted and unending anxiety. Instead, as a Jewish community our attention must be focused at how these individuals are received, not just by us, as Jews—but by everyone else in our community. The reactions are even more important than the initial action.

In the case of this incident, there is an easy way to gauge the reaction of the average person. Most of the online press coverage allowed for reader comments. Anonymous internet comments are not always pleasant to read, and probably should be avoided in most cases. However, in this case reading the comments can help us understand how others viewed the actions of the store owner. Hundreds of comments appeared within a day of the incident. Here are some examples:

I am so sorry that this happened to you.

Are you serious???!!! How ignorant. 

I’m so sorry that you were treated that way. Please know not all of the Jackson Metro area is like that!!!!!!

Let’s boycott this restaurant

Unbelievable…it makes me sad

Disgusting and an embarrassment to the rest of Mississippi!

Terrible. He does not deserve his business to be successful while treating another human being this way.

I will never step foot in that restaurant ever, and that is just awful. God is watching and I feel sad that someone would do that to that rabbi. I am never going to understand the ignorance of that owner. I want to wish that rabbi happy Rosh Hashanah, and blessings to him and his family.

Internet comments are rarely a source of inspiration. Yet, in this case these comments can serve as a gift. At first, Rabbi Riter’s lunch experience seemed like an unbelievable insult on the eve of the new year. But this unfortunate incident has turned into a blessing. We enter 5775 knowing that our neighbors are as appalled by this behavior as we are. People rushed to take the rabbi’s side and assure everyone, near and far, that this anti-Semitism is not a sentiment shared by other Mississippians. They have reached out to share their regret and show their support.

That’s the real story here.

May we be grateful to live in a country that both allows for people to say whatever they believe, and in which the overwhelming majority chooses to believe in righteousness, decency, and love. May 5775 be a year of increased love and respect among all peoples, here in Mississippi, across this nation, and around the world.

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Posted on October 6, 2014

Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on MyJewishLearning are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

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