Parents as Models

For better or worse, children learn how to be in the world from their parents.

Advertisement

Commentary on Parashat Nasso, Numbers 4:21-7:89

When you live with someone, it’s difficult to become a model.  People who live together see one another’s flaws and weaknesses and all their inconsistencies. Still, even with that reality, parents must be models for their children. For better or worse, children learn how to be in the world from their parents. Parents learn that it’s not what we instruct verbally, but what we do ourselves that is the most powerful teacher of all.

In this week’s Torah portion, the laws of a Nazarite are enumerated for someone who voluntarily takes on stringent rules for a defined period of time. No wine, no cutting of one’s hair, no contact with the dead. Samson was an example of a Nazarite whose goal was to achieve a higher-than-required level of holiness.

The example of the Nazarite discipline can lead us to reflect on what we can take on voluntarily to become a better model to our children, ethically and spiritually. For example, we might think of refraining from speaking ill of our neighbors, friends and family, to commit to a greater level of honesty, or volunteer to do social justice work. It’s important to choose a few specific areas and set achievable goals. We don’t want to create the illusion that we are perfect. That can only lead to

disappointment and disillusionment.  It’s important to be honest with our children about our weaknesses even as we try to model our strengths. If we aren’t open about our vulnerabilities, they are sure to notice!

TALK TO YOUR KIDS about areas of ethical behavior they can improve.

CONNECT TO THEIR LIVES:

· Who do you learn from?

· Who are your heroes and models?

· What do you learn from them?

· What areas of your life would you like to improve?

From “Values and Ethics: Torah Topics for Today,” available from Behrman House Publishers.

 

Help us keep Jewish knowledge accessible to millions of people around the world.

With your help, My Jewish Learning can provide endless opportunities for learning, connection and discovery.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

Discover More

Do Jews Fast for 40 Days If a Torah Is Dropped? 

This idea is widespread but has scant support in Jewish text.

“I’ll Have What She’s Having” Explores the American Jewish Deli (And Leaves You Hungry)

The traveling exhibit will be coming to New York, Texas and Illinois over the coming year.

Advertisement