This morning, I went crazy in Crown Heights. If you’re a first-born child, the way I am, today should have been your fast — that is, unless you managed to be at a seudat mitzvah, or a feast given for the completion of a mitzvah, like a brit milah or the completion of a tractate of Talmud. Finally, I hit a minyan where someone was just finishing up a tractate, as a huge cluster of people around him, fellow first-borns, pushed and pressed and listened.
When I get home, it’s more Passover fun. Somehow, in the midst of moving and reproducing, we’ve decided to make our own Passover seder for the first time ever — and, yes, it will be a dairy one.
So here’s what’s occupying my space and interest. First of all, the genius who came up with the hilarious — and, curiously enough, the semi-Biblically-accurate Facebook haggadah has an all-new version for this year. My favorite interaction — although, of course, it looks way better with formatting and graphics:
Pharaoh: Rough day today, so be nice. My dad entered immortality this morning, and Iâ€™ve assumed the throne and become the new Pharaoh. I even took over his account. Iâ€™m doing my best to carry on his legacy, but itâ€™s tough. And it didnâ€™t get any easier after dinner tonight when the cat threw up all over the carpet. Comment Â· Like Â· Share
Joseph: I am sorry to hear of your loss, my master.
Pharaoh: Who are you, and why are you writing on my wall?
Joseph: I meant no disrespect, my master.
Advisor: He is an Israelite. There are many of them. I do not know whether they are with us or against us.
Pharaoh: Let us deal shrewdly with them, lest they join with our enemies in time of war.
So that’s what’s keeping me sane — or half of it, anyway. JDub Records’ kids’ band, The Macaroons, are, predictably enough, enthused — this is their holiday, after all, and they have a new mini-album out, for which they’ve managed to release this video:
Pronounced: MIN-yun, meen-YAHN, Origin: Hebrew, quorum of 10 adult Jews (traditionally Jewish men) necessary for reciting many prayers.
Pronounced: SAY-der, Origin: Hebrew, literally “order”; usually used to describe the ceremonial meal and telling of the Passover story on the first two nights of Passover. (In Israel, Jews have a seder only on the first night of Passover.)