Britney Spears’ “Diary”

My girl Britney is at it again. It shouldn’t be much news that she is with this guy Jason Trawick, a Jew. Starlets date Jews all the time and it doesn’t make this blog (though, I just read that Miley Cyrus’ boyfriend is playing for England’s Maccabiah soccer team). But much like when it was rumored that Lindsay Lohan was thinking about converting to Judaism, the same holds true for Britney.

While there may be no truth to the story beyond Britney wearing a Star of David necklace, the media is still having a ton of fun with it. The funniest story, by far, has been Andy Borowitz’s fake Britney diary, written for the New Yorker. This is my favorite part:

“Shalom, Diary:

Here’s how Brit sees it: When a person is converting to Judaism, he or she should totally get points for things they’ve done that already make them part Jewish. Like, let’s say to be a Jewess you need twenty points. I think I have already earned points for the following Jewish thingies:

—Dating a hot Jew: two points. I think dating a Jew makes you partly Jewish, and the hotter the Jew the more points. Dating Jason wins me two points (tho I would get way more if I was dating that über-hot Jew in Maroon 5). Dating someone you met on JDate and basically just settled for gets you no points. (Snap!!!)”

Definitely worth checking out the whole thing. It’s pretty great.

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