The True Difference between Secular & Religious Jews

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Via Frum Satire, who bridges the gap himself with an impressive wallop of humor and self-mockery. He wrote an (as far as I can gather) imaginary conversation between two secular guys looking for a date on JDate, and two religious girls in the very same situation.

Shani: So, nu, what did this boy have to say?

Fraydie: Well, he first called me “very sweet” and asked me for a date, in his car! He said there was nothing to be afraid of. Fear, yiras shamayimso Godfearing!!

Shani: He is perfect!

Fraydie: Wait till you see his picture. Here, isn’t he cute?

Shani: Oy veh! (she turns away) He is not wearing a shirt! Where are his tztizis? And no kippah!

Fraydie: Hello! Earth to Shani – isn’t it obvious?

Shani: No.

Fraydie: It is a picture from the mikvah!! He’s obviously very frum.

( continued )