How To Form A New Chevra
Kadisha
Rebutting objections to forming
or joining a burial society--and practical steps on how to do so.
By Rabbi Abner
Weiss
Reprinted with permission from Death and Bereavement: A Halakhic Perspective (Ktav).The author makes
a few assumptions about Jewish communities from his perspective as an Orthodox
rabbi (e.g. that a rabbi will be male), but his heartfelt and practical advice
is applicable to Jews across the spectrum.
No Reasons Not To
Most congregations do not
have a chevra kadisha of their own,
thus missing out on all the advantages its existence provides. I have heard
many reasons given for not having a chevra, and I think that all of them are quite groundless. Let me give you some
examples:
- "Why should I do this work? What's in it
for a young person? Death is easier for old people to handle." WRONG. Everybody isvulnerable to death's intrusion, young and old
alike. And everybody feels
enriched by the importance of this loving and holy work. Why should such
feelings of fulfillment and satisfaction be withheld from the young?
- Modern, educated, Western people are squeamish
and uncomfortable around the dead. WRONG. This is only a
prejudice. They merely think that
they will be unable to get used to performing this task. After one or two
sessions, the initial discomfort and squeamishness will almost always
disappear.
- There is no room in a chevra kadisha for a person who genuinely will never be able to do hands-on work
with the dead. WRONG. Members of a chevra kadisha have many tasks. Some will merely sit with a
gentile driver of the hearse. Some will be in the same room as the
deceased, without direct contact, merely "watching." Some, like
kohanim [those descended from
the ancient priests, who traditionally are forbidden to have contact with
corpses except for immediate family members], will have no contact
with the dead whatsoever. But they can phone other volunteers, arrange
rides to the cemetery, organize the minyan
in the house of mourning, prepare meals for the bereaved, and help the
mourners in all kinds of ways. Everybody can play a useful role as a
member of the chevra kadisha.
- Hands-on work with the dead requires pious
volunteers who are strictly observant. WRONG. This is the ideal
situation. But if strictly observant volunteers are not available, great
merit accrues to all Jewish volunteers.
- It is better to leave the work to
professionals. Ignorant amateurs are bound to make unforgivable mistakes. WRONG. After a while, the work will come to be quite routine. There are
very few unforeseen circumstances. Even if they do arise, you can always
call a knowledgeable rabbi. And anyway, who says that even professionals
never make mistakes? We all do, and that is why even the most skilled and
experienced chevra kadishas ask
the deceased for forgiveness in a standard formula after each preparation
for burial.
- Chevra kadisha work is a tradition handed down
the generations, through family connections. Outsiders need not apply. WRONG. There is no mystery or secret lore surrounding the work. The tasks
are relatively simple, and can be learned by anybody.
- The training is exacting and exceedingly
time-consuming. WRONG. Only
one or two orientation sessions and a single demonstration are required.
You will be given a printed summary of procedures. You will then
"learn on the job."
- The work itself is time-consuming. WRONG. The preparation of the deceased person
for burial takes no more than an hour--much less, as the number of
workers increases.
- "I can't take time off from work to do the necessary tasks." WRONG. You do not have to. The preparation can
be done at night after work, or early in the morning before work.
- Professional funeral directors will resent the
competition, and be less cooperative when we really need them. WRONG. In my experience, professional funeral
directors encourage the formation of chevra
kadishas. They realize that an educated community knows not to take
the services of professionals for granted, and becomes even more sensitive
to what the professionals are doing as they come to share the problems.
Ten Steps to Start a New Chevra Kadisha
1. Ask your rabbi to publicize the need for its creation and to motivate
potential volunteers. He can use the pulpit and the synagogue bulletin for
creating interest.
2. Have the rabbi call and organize an initial meeting of potential
volunteers. Specific individuals should be "targeted" on the basis of
their potential suitability and invited personally. A good attendance must be assured at the first meeting.
3. Invite the leader of a working chevra
kadisha from another city to address the meeting. Your rabbi will be able
to research the available resources. Audiovisual materials are available, and
should be used. Easily readable books on the subject, such as A
Plain Pine Box, by Arnold M. Goodman (Ktav
Publishers), should be made available.
4. At the very first
meeting, elect your officers. At least three
responsible, devoted, and motivated people (best primed in advance of the
meeting) should be elected--a president, the head of the women's division, and
the head of the men's division of the chevra
[since women will attend to the bodies of women and girls, and men to the
bodies of men and boys, they work in separate teams].
5. A date should be set at the initial meeting for a study seminar, led
either by your rabbi or by an experienced worker from another community.
[Chapter Seven of the author's book can be used as the source material for this
seminar.]
6. At this second meeting, a date for a third--a hands-on demonstration
on a mannequin (a hospital often has such models available)--should be set.
7. If the professional funeral director in your town has been providing
halakhically-approved preparations [that is, those consonant with Jewish law],
arrange for the leaders of the newly formed chevra to be called out two or three times to participate
and to "learn on the job." If not, arrange for at least two men and
two women members of your chevra-in-formation to spend a day or two in a city where a good chevra
kadisha exists. The congregation
collectively, or a few sponsors, should cover the travel costs.
8. These four individuals will then become the teachers of some of the
other volunteers at the local funeral home.
9. The chevra
kadisha should now formulate its
rules, regulations, and standards, specifying the type of caskets, shrouds, and
so forth, which will be used. These rules, regulations, and standards should
be devised in cooperation with your rabbi and presented to him for subsequent
dissemination to the congregation. The chevra should purchase the necessary equipment.
10. The rabbi will now
announce the availability of the chevra kadisha services to the congregation in a sermon, in the synagogue bulletin, and
in an interview with the local news media. This information should include the
phone numbers of the heads of the chevra kadisha, and should urge the community to call upon the chevra whenever death intrudes into the life of their
family.
Rabbi Abner Weiss has
served as a congregation rabbi in Beverly Hills, CA and London., and is a noted
writer, lecturer and community leader.
He is known as a halakhic authority, has published a number of articles
on Jewish bioethics, and currently serves as a dayan (judge) of the Beth Din (rabbinic court) of Los Angeles