Author Archives: Missy Goldstein

Missy Goldstein

About Missy Goldstein

Missy Goldstein is a 2013-2015 Education Fellow at the ISJL.

My Many Southern Jewish Families

The 2013-2015 ISJL Education Fellow Family. We really did have these done at JC Penney.

The 2013-2015 ISJL Education Fellow Family. We really did have these done at JC Penney.

For my family, like many Jewish families, holidays play an important role in our life. Holidays are the times when we all get together. There are endless, crazy traditions. Holidays meant coming home, and being with my family.

I grew up in Florida, and went to college in Florida. When my parents moved from Florida to Texas, I suddenly had a to plan on a plane ride instead of a two-hour drive to be with my family for the holidays. Then I graduated from college and started a real job, forcing me to face the reality of not spending every holiday with my family. Being “home for the holidays” was no longer a given.

I certainly am not alone. Every recent college graduate balances making it home for celebrations with our families to what our “grown up life” and holiday celebrations will look like. Luckily, with my first out-of-college job, I literally am not alone.

When I moved to Jackson to start work for the ISJL, I knew that I was joining a new family. My Education Fellow cohort has family dinners together. We look out for each other. We bring each other pints of ice cream with a Shabbat candle for birthdays, squeal over the sweet story of a fellow Fellow’s engagement, and make sure that everyone has a family with whom to spend the holidays. We celebrate together. And yes, we have even and taken family portraits at JC Penney together.

This year in particular, I have been truly blessed in the holiday-celebration regard. One of our board members invited anyone who was in town to spend all or part of the High Holy days with her family in Greenwood, Mississippi. Even though I wasn’t able to spend Yom Kippur with my family, another family opened its arms to welcome me in. I fasted, watched football, and broke fast with M&Ms and Diet Coke—just as I would have done with my family of origin.

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As Education Fellows, this happens to us all year round. We each have six or seven communities that we visit and, with the gift of home hospitality, we are lucky to be welcomed into many families throughout our two years. We light the candles at Shabbat dinners in these families’ homes, and hear about how everybody’s week has been. They allow us to truly be part of the family and the greater community; in addition to celebrating many Jewish holidays, I have also cheered at soccer games (even though I don’t entirely remember the rules), attended local craft and historical festivals, and participated in a charity fundraiser.

Other Fellows have enjoyed family movie nights, gone on afternoon hikes, and visited kids’ art shows; there’s no end to the possibilities!

Not only do our hosts welcome us into their families for the weekend, but we also share our lives with them. We tell stories about the shenanigans and adventures of group summer visits. Especially as second year Fellows, we want to contact our hosts or education directors when exciting things develop for graduate school or plans for Life After The Fellowship.

I still love getting to be with my family. I also love how much more “family” I have now. When I first started at the ISJL in June 2013, I added 8 Fellows to my family. Over the last 18 months, that family has grown exponentially with every summer, fall, and spring visit I make. Not every recent college graduate gets so warmly embraced by so many families, who make us feel at home even when we’re far from home. I look forward to continuing growing my Southern Jewish family this year, and staying in touch as the world takes us in all different directions.

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Posted on November 3, 2014

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Mensch Madness, Game 2: Devorah vs. Miriam!

It’s a big sports week in the Jewish South! First, there’s a new Jewish college basketball coach at a big school down here, which folks are clearly pretty excited about. And second…

It’s time for Mensch Madness, Game Two!

We have a very close game today. Our number two seed, Miriam is up against our number three seed, Devorah.

This is going to be a tough match-up. Both of these powerhouses had a big impact, and both had songs written about them by Debbie Friedman, which elevates both in my eyes…

pass-miriam_032213Let’s start with Miriam: She is very well known, seeing as she is an important character in the story of Passover (coming up soon!) and the Exodus. As Moses’ sister, Miriam was the one responsible for putting baby Moses in a basket and down the river, where the Pharaoh’s daughter found him. Already brave, Miriam approached Pharaoh’s daughter and told her that she knew a woman who could nurse the baby (hint: it’s their mother, Yocheved).

Once the Jews were finally across the Red Sea, Miriam led everyone in song, dancing with her timbrel. During the Jews’ time in the desert, a well of water followed Miriam because of her merit and righteousness. HOWEVER, we must not forget that Miriam suffers from the affliction of leprosy after she and her brother Aaron speak ill of Moses’ wife, a Cushite woman. Lashon hara, gossip, is certainly not an admirable characteristic, but it shouldn’t over shadow her positive attributes.

deborahAnd then there’s Devorah: She is not as public a figure as her competitor, but she was a great leader for the Jewish people after Moses, Miriam, and Aaron died. Devorah was a judge in Israel; she was a strong woman, without whom Barak (a general) would not enter battle: “If thou wilt go with me, then I will go; but if thou wilt not go with me, I will not go.” Devorah is happy to join in the journey, but in being realistic about gender roles of the time reminds Barak that he will not receive any glory because a woman is accompanying him as an advisor in battle.

But Devorah does not flee from leadership, even despite the gender norms of the day. Devorah is therefore seen as a mother in Israel, during a time when leadership was much needed.  Israel was finally at peace, with Devorah at the helm.

Miriam and Devorah were both amazing women, who are great role models among women from the Tanakh. In this very close game, every move counts… and Miriam fouled with her negative attitude towards Moses’ wife, while Devorah accepted her leadership position and held court with poise.  Her bravery and strength are ever-present, despite the male-dominated community.

As the only female judge of the time, I consider her a trailblazer, a pioneer, a winner in this round of Mensch Madness! See y’all at the next game!

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Posted on March 21, 2014

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What’s Your Jewish Super Bowl?

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At the grocery in my neighborhood!

When I moved to Jacksonville, Florida, in 2006, I noticed much more general affiliation with university sports than I’d ever seen before.

I saw a “house divided” flag outside a home with University of Florida and Florida State University on either side, and I didn’t quite understand. In 2009, I joined the Gator Nation and finally understood the obsession. Fall means football in the South. Now that the college football season is over we can focus on the NFL playoffs and the upcoming Super Bowl XLVIII.

The Super Bowl is the once-a-year, end-all-be-all of professional football. Even if you don’t care about the game the Super Bowl is often the showcase for some of the funniest commercials shown all year, as well as a half-time show that is always full of surprises.

As the daughter of two avid Patriots fans, I’ve watched many a Super Bowl over the past several years. And as the daughter of a Jewish educator, I spent a lot of time growing up at temple. This got me to wondering, do we have a Jewish equivalent to this supreme sports event?

Yom Kippur is often called the holiest day of the year. Just like when people who don’t watch football the whole rest of the year make sure that they are watching the Super Bowl, if for no other reason than to be able to talk about with co-workers the next day. In the movie Keeping the Faith, Ben Stiller even refers to Yom Kippur as the Super Bowl of the Jewish calendar. It’s a time when rabbis write a “best of” sermon and Jews, who might not attend services the rest of the year, skip work and class to attend temple.

But in my home there is nothing better than Passover! You may not like eating matzah for 7 days, but there are few things greater than grandpa’s stories that he tells every year, delicious matzah ball soup, and singing—LOTS of singing—to make seder fun.  Who said you can’t live off seder leftovers for the rest of Passover?  Trust me…it can be done!

There are many other important Jewish holidays throughout the year, and everybody has a different connection to each.

So I’ll just leave you with this question: What is your Jewish Super Bowl?

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Posted on January 27, 2014

Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on MyJewishLearning are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy