My Camp is Definitely Jewish

As you’ve probably figured out by now (that is, if you read me), I’m a big fan of the website CollegeHumor.com. While I usually go to their site for the original videos (which are just fantastic), they also put up some great written content.

They have a running series called “The Graphic Truth,” which uses charts and graphs for comedic purposes (as opposed to making me almost fail 10th grade math. Thanks Mrs. Mendelsohn!). This week’s edition is called “How Jewish Is Your Camp?” Here is the chart:

camp.jpg
Likelihood It’s A Nazi Summer Camp
Worried Letters from home
Intercamp Sports Dominance
Hatred of “Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh”
Sabbaths Observed
Distance from either coast
Black kids
Pharaohs Thwarted

I know that it’s a joke. But I’m gonna have to dissect this a bit.

First, the “Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh” reference. Oh come on. Kids don’t know who Allan Sherman is. I would change this  to “Love for the Grateful Dead.” Extra points for the ability for the campers to trade live Phish show CDs.

Second, “Intercamp Dominance.” Again, poor reference. Any good Jewish camp would be smart enough to not book any intercamp events with a non-Jewish camp. Really, Jewish camps are playing other Jewish camps, making the playing field level. Also, if the camp is kosher (and that’s a big if), why book an intercamp with a non-Jewish camp? What would they eat for lunch?

I also have a few categories to add. Why isn’t there a line for “Amount of times Rick Recht has been to your camp in the past 5 years?” And if you’re wondering, Sheldon Low doesn’t count. Just Rick Recht. No knock-offs.

How about “Impromptu Israeli Folk Dancing Sessions?” If I had a dollar for every time I’ve had to make my way through a bunch of 12 year olds dancing to “Yachad“…well, lets just say I’d be able to buy a lot of popsicles at the Tuck Shop.

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